With this accelerated retirement I’ve been puzzling about how to manage my website. I’m not nearly as concerned with making money now; but I am much more concerned about staying in touch with the people who have been my friends, family, and my wonderful clients.
So, my blog is moving. You can find the news, the newest goings on and our travels on the Blog Peggy and I are writing now: Away We Go. Come along with us and see what mischief we get into.
This time of year my mind turns to wamer climes.
Many brilliant people have some communication weak spots. Unfortunately, the reality is that written communication is a big part of business, and how you write reflects on you. Poor spelling and grammar can destroy a professional image in an instant.
Even if your job doesn’t require much business writing, you’ll still have emails to send and notes to write. And if you’re looking for a job, your cover letters and resumes will likely mean the difference between getting the interview or not.
Bad grammar and spelling make a bad impression. Don’t let yourself lose an opportunity over a simple spelling or grammar mistake.
Here are seven simple grammatical errors that I see consistently in emails, cover letters and resumes.
Tip: Make yourself a little card cheat sheet and keep it in your wallet for easy reference.
You’re / Your
The apostrophe means it’s a contraction of two words; “you’re” is the short version of “you are” (the “a” is dropped), so if your sentence makes sense if you say “you are,” then you’re good to use you’re. “Your” means it belongs to you, it’s yours.
You’re going to love your new job!
It’s / Its
This one is confusing, because generally, in addition to being used in contractions, an apostrophe indicates ownership, as in “Dad’s new car.” But, “it’s” is actually the short version of “it is” or “it has.” “Its” with no apostrophe means belonging to it.
It’s important to remember to bring your telephone and its extra battery.
They’re / Their / There
“They’re” is a contraction of “they are.” “Their” means belonging to them. “There” refers to a place (notice that the word “here” is part of it, which is also a place – so if it says here and there, it’s a place). There = a place
They’re going to miss their teachers when they leave there.
Loose / Lose
These spellings really don’t make much sense, so you just have to remember them. “Loose” is the opposite of tight, and rhymes with goose. “Lose” is the opposite of win, and rhymes with booze. (To show how unpredictable English is, compare another pair of words, “choose” and “chose,” which are spelled the same except the initial sound, but pronounced differently. No wonder so many people get it wrong!)
I never thought I could lose so much weight; now my pants are all loose!
Lead / Led
Another common but glaring error. “Lead” means you’re doing it in the present, and rhymes with deed. “Led” is the past tense of lead, and rhymes with sled. So you can “lead” your current organization, but you “led” the people in your previous job.
My goal is to lead this team to success, just as I led my past teams into winning award after award.
A lot / Alot / Allot
First the bad news: there is no such word as “alot.” “A lot” refers to quantity, and “allot” means to distribute or parcel out.
There is a lot of confusion about this one, so I’m going to allot ten minutes to review these rules of grammar.
Between you and I
This one is widely misused, even by TV news anchors who should know better.
In English, we use a different pronoun depending on whether it’s the subject or the object of the sentence: I/me, she/her, he/him, they/them. This becomes second nature for us and we rarely make mistakes with the glaring exception of when we have to choose between “you and I” or “you and me.”
Grammar Girl does a far better job of explaining this than I, but suffice to say that “between you and I” is never correct, and although it is becoming more common, it’s kind of like saying “him did a great job.” It is glaringly incorrect.
The easy rule of thumb is to replace the “you and I” or “you and me” with either “we” or “us” and you’ll quickly see which form is right. If “us” works, then use “you and me” and if “we” works, then use “you and I.”
Between you and me (us), here are the secrets to how you and I (we) can learn to write better.
Master these common errors and you’ll remove some of the mistakes and red flags that make you look like you have no idea how to speak.
Cherokee Wisdom
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said, “My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.
One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: “Which wolf wins?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”
Wise people, though all laws were abolished, would lead the same life. — Aristophanes
Never mistake knowledge for wisdom: The first helps you make a living; the second helps you make a life. — Sandra Carny
Chance favors the prepared mind. — Louis Pasteur
Love is like playing the piano. First you must learn to play by the rules, then you must forget the rules and play from your heart.
Judge each day, not by the harvest, but by the seeds you plant.
Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand, and melting like a snowflake. — Sir Francis Bacon
If you have two pennies, spend one on bread to give you life, and one on a flower to give meaning to your life. — Ancient Chinese Proverb
Hospitality meets its greatest test when a new idea drops by uninvited.
The man who trusts men will make fewer mistakes than he who distrusts them. — Cavour
If a wise man contendeth with a foolish man, whether he rage or laugh, there is no rest. — Proverbs, 29:9
A single sunbeam is enough to drive away many shadows. — St. Francis of Assisi
Providing for others is a fundamental responsibility of human life. — Woodrow Wilson
Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive, and then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive. — Harold Whitman
He who marries the Sprit of the Age will be a widower in the age to come.
Action without study is fatal. Study without action is futile. — Mary Beard
No one grows old by living — only by losing interest in living. — Marie Beynon Ray
Simplicity doesn’t mean to live in misery and poverty. You have what you need, and you don’t want to have what you don’t need. — Charan Singh
The three grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for. — Alexander Chalmers
Circus performers know that they can break their necks falling into a net; it is the uncertainty which keeps them skillful and careful. They know also that the net can save their lives; it is this confidence which makes them daring. — S. Helen Kelley
Who lives without folly is not so wise as he thinks. — Francois, Duc de La Rochefoucauld
Happiness is a journey, not a destination. So …
Work like you don’t need the money,
love like you’ve never been hurt,
and dance like no one is watching.
“Make lots of money”, “enjoy the work”, “operate within the law”: choose 2. — Brian Anderson
This is the excellent foppery of the world, that, when we are sick in fortune, — often the surfeit of our own behavior, — we make guilty of our disasters the sun, the moon, and the stars: as if we were villains by necessity; fools by heavenly compulsion; knaves, thieves, and treachers, by spherical predominance; drunkards, liars, and adulterers, by an enforced obedience of planetary influence; and all that we are evil in, by a divine thrusting on: an admirable evasion of whoremaster man, to lay his goatish disposition to the charge of a star! My father compounded with my mother under the dragon’s tail; and my nativity was under Ursa major; so that it follows, I am rough and lecherous. Tut, I should have been that I am, had the maidenliest star in the firmament twinkled on my bastardizing. King Lear, Act I, Scene ii.
I would recommend to everyone that admirable precept which Pythagoras is said to have given to his disciples: “Pitch upon that course of life which is the most excellent, and custom will render it the most delightful.” Men whose circumstances will permit tham to choose their own way of life are inexcusable if they do not pursue that which their judgment tells them is the most laudable. The voice of reason is more to be regarded than the bent of any present inclination, since, by the rule above mentioned, inclination will at length come over to reason, though we can never force reason to comply with inclination. Joseph Addison
Life is a test. It is only a test. If it had been real, you would have been told where to go and what to do.
No, seriously, here are some useful
I suspect you will be surprised at how well you’re doing already.
Always err on the side of generosity.
In case of emergency, keep loose change and a handkerchief in every pair of pants you own.
Don’t toot your own horn.
Take pleasure in small things -
a warm sweater
licorice Allsorts
a fuchsia flower
a joke
anything Irish
a cup of tea
finches building a nest on the porch.
Be courteous and respectful of everyone.
Always be a kid at heart.
If you want to make a point, quote scripture.
Never mistreat a book, for books are your friends.
Don’t throw anything away that might be useful some day – you never know when you’ll need another scrap of paper, a rubber band, an extra toothbrush, an old magazine, or a stale piece of gum.
Always keep several stashes of candy, preferably chocolate, for yourself and guests.
A glass of Sherry aids digestion.
Write thank-you notes.
Don’t raise your voice in anger.
Trust in the Lord always.
Pray daily – the exercise machine and the car are good places for prayer.
Finally, the verse Dad helped me pick out as 7th grade communicant to guide me throughout my life: Proverbs 3:6:
In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.
In all his ways, he lived that life. Thank you, Dad.
I’ve Learned-
that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
I’ve learned-
that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.
I’ve learned-
that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
I’ve learned-
that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.
I’ve learned-
that it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.
I’ve learned-
that you should never ruin an apology with an excuse.
I’ve learned-
that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something.
I’ve learned-
that you shouldn’t compare yourself to the best others can do.
I’ve learned-
that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I’ve learned-
that it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
I’ve learned-
that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
I’ve learned-
that you can keep going long after you can’t.
I’ve learned-
that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I’ve learned-
that either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I’ve learned-
that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.
I’ve learned-
that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
I’ve learned-
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I’ve learned-
that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I’ve learned-
that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up.
I’ve learned-
that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.
I’ve learned-
that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.
I’ve learned-
that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.
I’ve learned-
that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.
I’ve learned-
that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.
I’ve learned-
that your family won’t always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren’t related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren’t biological.
I’ve learned-
that it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you are to learn to forgive yourself.
I’ve learned-
that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.
I’ve learned-
that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I’ve learned-
that a rich person is not the one who has the most, but is one who needs the least.
I’ve learned-
that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.
I’ve learned-
that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I’ve learned-
that you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I’ve learned-
that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I’ve learned-
that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.
I’ve learned-
that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.
I’ve learned-
that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I’ve learned-
that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.
I’ve learned-
that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings, and standing up for what you believe.
I’ve learned-
that people will forget what you said, and people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
Once I found out the secret of the Universe. I have forgotten what it was, but I know that the Creator does not take Creation seriously, for I remember that He sat in Space with all His Work in front of Him and laughed. — Lord Dunsany, “The Hashish Man”
Why do so many of us get side tracked with things that dont matter; things that that only cause friction with others?
Life is hard enough without wasting energy on things that do not move us forward towards out life’s goals. But there are always ways to change that. Sometimes they are easy; other times the choices require strength and determination — and the courage to live up to what we know we can accomplish.
